For women wondering whether/how to find husbands online, Yashodhara
Pawar of Princeton, N.J., has a few words of advice. Although she did not use an online
matrimonial service, she did meet her husband in cyberspace. "Grit your teeth,"
she tells a group of South Asian women in an on-line discussion group. "Accept it.
Internet is here to stay. You can buy books and find a husband on the Internet. This is a
very simple primer. Just do it."
1. On an Internet Service Provider, make a "profile" for you.
AOL has a profile that lets you enter your hobbies and passions and you can check
others’ as well. For me, I could see right away that if a specimen liked bikes,
guitars and hi-fi, he was not my type. In contrast, my husband liked Tarkovsky films,
backcountry hiking in Catskills, photography.
2. Remain open for chats, discussion boards and swallow your pride and
be gritty. It is a bungee jump. 3. Be quick to reject. And be quick to accept.
4. Exchange pictures early on. Show your appreciation for a hunk and
your displeasure at someone obviously ugly. Because, this is the real world and you
eventually will be intimate with him as you are human.
5. Meet, meet and take it offline as soon as possible after liking
someone online because you would not know if he wears deodorant and remember serial
monogamy is very ineffective. So gotta be quick to reject.
6. Remain friends with all rejected. They are friends and networkers to
jobs, other men, cheap air tickets.
7. Be safe! No address or last name. Meet in a public place for the
first few times. Let someone know you are off and where you will be. Return home at a safe
time. Do not invite him home nor visit him at his.
8. Enjoy! Humans are such wonderfully intricate creatures that relating
to them should transcend simplistic social categories like husband, brother, great
grandfather.
9. After committing to someone you met, continue meeting people online.
But clarify that you ain’t looking for love. The men who are love-a-hunting will run
and ones that are still interested in being friend will stay and remain friends. The world
does not stop when you commit. I still meet men and women online.
10. Now that you two are hooked, never use the Internet to communicate
with the siginificant other. You will find out why then.
